I Forgive You.

Before I begin to write this open letter, I would like to thank the love of my life (you know who you are) and my therapist who helped me reach this stage in my life. Thank you for helping me letting go and staying with me throughout the stages of my life.

My dear Readers,

I know this letter has reached you even if I have not posted the letter to your home. I thank the carrier of this letter for helping me reach my desired destinations.

I forgive you. I forgive for all the wrong things that you did to me. I forgive you for hurting me in the places where I had already been hurt. I was in tremendous pain while you mercilessly carried out the acts. Yet, I forgive you. I forgive you for breaking my trust, for your disloyalty and for the time when you abandoned me and believed The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived, instead of me. I forgive him too, for adding on to the fire that had been set to our palace.

Do you remember the times when we talked about the stars and the Universe and all the unseen and made them ours? I still remember your voice echoing through the air even when we were miles apart. I remember our laughs as we played pretend and built numerous palaces and fortresses and discovered ancient ruins. Do you remember telling me the story of Albatross? I do. But I think the Goddess of Fortune and Story found us silly, as after a few months I became the Albatross and you shot me down with your mistrust.

You were my twin flame, my sister, my greatest friend, and the loss of my life. When you left, I broke down into thousands of pieces which you had gathered with care only a few years back. I was angry that you left me stranded in the desert which we promised that we’ll cross together. You told me after you left, that you missed me and you grieved for losing me, but what could have been done? We left our crystal city and had gone separate ways. I thought I had forgiven you, but I realised that I had not. Because I was still clutching at our memories together even after the ship was abandoned.

So, then I realised that maybe I had not yet forgiven you, because you see, the child in me, still wanted to hold on to your memory, because she was so happy for the amount of love which she received from you. But it was not healthy for her. So I had to slowly coax her to let you go. And so today, she writes her final goodbye to you. You were a blessing and a curse in my life. I have never been wounded and healed like before. So, I forgive you. And I also forgive The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived, because it is time for me now to stop re-reading the unfinished book and wondering what would have happened, if we did finish our story.

Maybe, this is our closure and the end of our story. I thank you, both of you, for coming in my life and taking me to both hell and heaven and making me realise, who I am and who I want to be. Maybe, if both of you hadn’t entered my life, I would have never found true happiness, friendship and love. I am healing. But, I can only truly heal if I let you go. Both of you. For truly this time. Because I want to board a new ship and sail to a new country, a new city of story with the love of my life. Like a true Captain and Lover, my Love has waited for me long enough in the shores of our abandoned city.

So I forgive you, today, my twin flame and The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived. I wish you a lifetime of happiness. May you be kind and gentle to the next person who comes in your life. I truly wish you peace and I let you go today.

I forgive you.

From,

The Lost Queen of our Abandoned City.