I have always loved water. Probably because that is the only “Nature” I had been exposed to. Or maybe because of my Zodiac signs. Oh yeah. I am an astrology girl. In case you are wondering, it’s Cancer and Scorpio. There you go. A completely unrelated information just out here hanging around, because I want to. I actually feel that this is one of the places where I can just write nonsense and I’ll be forgiven. Ironically, this is the last place I visit. However, if you are reading this blog, just so you know this is mine and you are welcome to meander here if you are not disrupting my peace. Or anybody else’s. Now, let’s begin.
Why such a dramatic title? Because I am dramatic and I felt like. Of the three words that I chose to be the title of my blog, I relate to it in some way or another. Yes, even a Witch. Hold your hats on, I’ll explain. So, Water. Well, it is one of the most calming elements I find in my life. Whether it’s rain, the sea, the lake, anything, I LOVE WATER. Yes, even drinking it. Water to me has a different meaning. It’s calm, chaotic, troublesome, and soothing at the same time. Ergo, my whole personality. I am too much and too little at the same time. There is no in-between and it is always the extreme. Like either it’s a flood or a draught. However, I somehow deal with it. I think it would be fair of me to say that I am also terrified of it. I think it is one of those elements in Nature where we know absolutely nothing about it. We know its source, but we don’t know where it ends. In a lake, sure. But the sea and the oceans… we think we know that it ends at the banks of the continents, but just think about it. Deeply. We are on a planet where more than seventy percent of it is water. Basically, we are living on islands that we humans proudly call “Continents”. However, water flows in every crack, every orifice, and through every granule of the soil. I got this idea of writing the blog, in my shower. SHOWER. Where I was using Water. Do you get my point? I never thought I’d think about something, especially basic things, which are only useful to us for our survival. Huh, interesting or delusional? I’ll take delusional. You are free to choose what you want.
Delusion. My favorite word. Also, my personality. I love being delusional. I love living on fantasy lands, till reality hits me hard in the face. So why a witch and suddenly why am I using the word delusion so much and out of the blue. Well, because I believe in them. Now, I am not going to argue or scratch your face or scratch people, if you don’t believe in witches. I have no anger against you. But people, who believe, hello, nice to meet you. I don’t practice any witchcraft. I don’t curse people. I don’t bless people. I just believe in the notion that all the words that we speak influence the energy in the Universe. If you are thinking that I am one of those women with crystal balls and use the word “chakra” in every sentence, you are wrong. I am your plain and old and simple Mary Jane. A quiet, not-so-little, anxiety-ridden nerd, who believes in magic and miracles. Why? Because I feel it every day. I feel that there is a huge Supreme Energy that is guiding me and my every action and reaction. I believe that everything happens for a reason and not question something if that is happening in my life. Any situation, any scenario, I have stopped questioning it. Because after every huge turmoil or breakthrough and even minor incident in my life I see the reason. Now, there will be many realists who might be reading my blog and think that I have slowly started to lose it, well, too bad, I already know. See, I believe that human beings need a reason to live. They need a purpose and they need faith to live in this world. Whether you believe in God, Satan, Fairies, Angels, Pixies, Norse Gods, or anything, you need something to hold on to. We are social creatures. Whether I like it or not, we have to live in a community, where there are going to be people who are not going to accept us. But that’s OK. Like the water is built from tiny droplets of “water”, build your own ocean with tiny droplets like yourselves. Trust me, if women with supernatural powers could form a coven by finding more “odd” women then you can too. Be like a witch. Focus on building your own coven.
Outcast. Ooof! Such a negative word. Well, that’s what I felt most of my life. I really had a hard time fitting in groups or with people, because I was not like them. You know, I don’t think in a certain way, I don’t act in a certain, I am not a certain way. People, I mean normal people love to scream and protest and preach – “Be different. Let your inner energy shine.” Well, guess what, these “normal people” make people who are slightly odd or different making them feel like an outcast, their whole life. I had a few of them in my childhood, and oh my God, have they given some rise to my anxiety, because of their “preachings”. See, outcasts are not born. They are made to be an outcast. I am not going to go full blowout regarding outcasts’ life, because then I’ll be doing exactly the same thing those people did with me many years back. Pushing into a group, into a category, and shaming them indirectly. I am different. Great. You are different? Superb! I am not here to tell you how to live your life. You know better how to live your life. If one thing I have learned the hard way, in these years, the more you describe yourself by hearing what people are saying about you, you are creating an imposter. You start to lose yourself every single day, and then you don’t even recognize yourself. So try to define yourself. I listened to every damn opinion of people. And now, I have a hard time describing myself and my existing relationships suffer because I cannot trust them, you know the people. So instead of forming these ideas about yourself, just because you’re then best friends and ex-boyfriends or girlfriends called you so and so, YOU DO NOT BECOME THAT. YOU ARE NOT THAT. I have a hard time moving on from instances that caused me to question and doubt myself, and that led me to have low self-esteem, trust issues, and problems in my existing relationship. So, let’s not do that to ourselves. Let’s be like those tiny witches and the raging waters and raise holy hell against those who call you “Outcasts!”.
My Secret Hideout. 
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